The 11 Hour Shift

I mean...the title pretty much sums it all up. I was supposed to go in at 6pm like normal, until my phone buzzes with an 'SMS' message at about 1pm from my manager asking me if I can come in early at 4pm. This is where my nice guy chromosome kicks in--I really didn't have a reason to not come in early so I obliged. I just of easily could of said that I couldn't but:

1. They probably needed help setting up for the big pub crawl that night, and

B. of all, more hours=extra paper in my pocket (paper is a street term for cheddar, which means green, which means money)

So I come in early at 4, and whats my first task? If you guessed shoveling snow on the sidewalk to make room for the Trolly to pull up to the bar, you're wrong. Jk. You're right. But at least the temperature outside was starting to warm up so it wasn't completely terrible.

After shoveling a pile of snow, only to create a higher pile of snow 5 feet away from the original pile, we find out that one of the back rooms is flooding. Mind you, this is all happening before 6--when the shift is supposed to actually start.

I come to the backroom to see half of it flooded with maybe an inch or two of water from melted snow. I also come to see the ridiculous method that I was told to help remedy the flood.

We were to take dust pans, sweep (pun not intended) the floor to collect water, than dump it in a garbage can. After few attempts and observing the molasses pace and progress we were making, I start think to myself, 'Hey. We're four intelligent guys here, there's gotta be a more efficient, less idiotic way to collect the water.'

This is the part of the post that I make a recommendation to bar owners/managers across the nation: Invest in a Wet-Vac. Seems like a logical product to have in a bar. But hey, that's why I'm the lowly doorman and not the great idea man.

The rest of the night went pretty smooth for how crazy people were getting. Had to kick a girl out because she literally could not stand under her own power, but overall nothing too crazy... Except for a few couples who thought that the bar was their bedroom, a fatter version of Snooki (and it wasn't a Halloween costume, just her regular outfit and hair), and a white guy who had a dancing motor that did not stop.

Sadly or hilariously, this young gentleman was getting much lower than any female i've ever seen and the dj was provoking him by playing songs that told us to 'get low' or 'drop it down low,' etc... I give him credit though, he truly danced like no one was watching. Unfortunately for him, everyone was.

I ended up leaving at 3am hence, 'The 11 Hour Shift.'

If you're gonna 'dance like no one is watching,' make sure that no one is actually watching. If you are at a crowded bar I recommend you 'dance like everybody is watching.'